


Shooting and shitting

by MavisDracula81



Category: 9-1-1 (TV)
Genre: F/M, Family Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-29
Updated: 2020-03-29
Packaged: 2021-02-28 19:40:56
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,610
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23382469
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MavisDracula81/pseuds/MavisDracula81
Summary: Athena and Bobby discussing their working days at home at the evening. Takes place at the end of episode 3x12.
Relationships: Athena Grant/Bobby Nash
Comments: 8
Kudos: 25





	Shooting and shitting

**Author's Note:**

> This story was born as a result of the frustration after watching no Bathena in the latest episodes 3x11 and 3x12. So I thought Bobby would definitely discuss their cases with Athena and it can be actually funny. At least it was my intention - to make y'all smile and maybe even giggle. Sorry for whatever you won't like. I don't own anything besides my mistakes.

Today Athena got back home significantly later than usual. Bobby had time not only for taking shower and changing, but also for helping out Harry with the biology home work. He felt pretty tired and decided to order the dinner from the German restaurant that he discovered for himself not long ago.

Athena came home after they took Joan’s husband into custody. He wasn’t the easiest person to deal with, so Athena and Rick had to do some extra paper work to properly prepare all the documents for judge.

“Hey everybody, I’m home!” – she yelled announcing her presence and closing the entrance door.

Noticing Bobby and kids right in the living room, she was surprised by not smelling any food being preparing. 

“Are you guys seriously still waiting for me without making any dinner??” – she asked.

“Hi, Love, we are also happy to see you at home.” – Bobby kissed Athena’s cheek. – “I had no energy to cook tonight and ordered from the “Red Lion Tavern”. I’m sure, you all will love their Sausage Platter, I tried it last week and it was insanely delicious.”

“Oh, you are tired…. I see…” – Athena nodded. – “I’m kinda exhausted from today’s case too. But.. Don’t want to spoil the meal with it, let’s eat, I’m so hungry.”

They ate and were accompanied by kids’ conversations about their day. The food was as delicious as Bobby predicted. Harry washed the plates and the table after they’ve finished.

When kids went upstairs to get on their phones a bit before going to bed, Bobby decided to talk to his wife.

“So what was the case today? You said it exhausted you… I mean aside from the conversation with Michael at noon, which you told me about on the phone…” – Bobby started.

“Ah.. well, crazy stuff – the husband shot his own wife, because he was fed up with her throughout their 30 years of marriage. Luckily, the bullet didn’t kill her, just got stuck in the back of her head. She didn’t even realize it happened because her memory started to fail her over the course of time.”

“Wow.. Why didn’t he just apply for divorce if it was that bad?” – asked Bobby surprisingly.

“Fair question. He wasn’t dependent on her financially.. They didn’t have kids. Nobody was sick… Nothing seemed to hold him from getting a divorce. Maybe he wasn’t comfortable with the idea of changing his whole life, I don’t know… I decided I’m not his therapist to figure out his motivation. Especially because he wasn’t the nicest person in the world – he tried to attack us during the investigation, and even after being taken to the police station, he acted like an idiot. And from what his wife told… Imagine, he broke a gnome figurine and a blown glass, which she made for him homemade…. I mean, why be so cruel?” – Athena shared. 

“Sounds like he carried the hatred for her deep inside of him for many years…” – responded Bobby thoughtfully. 

“Obviously, yeah…” – Athena agreed. – “How was your day though?”

“Well, after you arrested the fools from “Army of Shay”, it was mostly funny. This girl went on her first date with a guy. Everything went well, until she decided to go to the bathroom. The toilet wasn’t working, she got confused and couldn’t decide better than trying to throw away the.. hmm..results of her certain activities to the street. Then she got stuck in the window.” – resumed Bobby with the smile. 

“Ewwww, oh my goodness!” – Athena laughed. – Apparently men make her extremely nervous. The first date and all. Poor thing.”

“What would you do if you were in her shoes, huh?” – Bobby challenged her but also laughed. 

“What the hell do you mean?” – protested Athena jokingly. – “If I come to your condo for the first date??”

“Yeah, exactly. What if I wasn’t such a gentleman, which I was,” – Bobby smirked cockily – “and invited you directly to my condo for a first date? We weren’t strangers to each other, hypothetically we could have skipped the phase of dating in crowded public places.” 

“I would say: “go to hell, Captain!”” – Athena narrowed her eyes. – “But in any case, I wouldn’t let you into the bathroom and made you call the plumber, who would come and fix the problem, and then okay – I would be out there.” 

“Oh c’mon, would you stay inside the bathroom the whole time while waiting for the plumber to come? Are you kidding me? You wouldn’t!” – Bobby objected knowing the active nature of his wife, who couldn’t stay still for an hour or even more being locked in the bathroom.

“Well, maybe I would come out, but I wouldn’t let YOU in there before the plumber fixed the problem.” – stated Athena firmly.

Bobby laughed in disbelief. “Why do people make such a big issue out of the natural body process?” 

“Oh let’s not talk about shit, seriously.” – Athena rolled her eyes on him.

“Why not? We are like closest people in the world to one another, Athena, I don’t want you to be ashamed if our toilet would go crazy.” – responded Bobby chuckling.

“I appreciate your attempt to pretend that you are okay with this subject.” – Athena cut off. 

“I’m not pretending!!!” – Bobby protested. 

“Okay, okay, let me ask you another thing. What would make you want to shoot me?” – Athena frankly had no interest to discuss any physical details anymore. 

“Nooo… “ – Bobby wasn’t going to even imagine himself doing such a terrible thing to the love of his life. 

“I mean, seriously, there must be something that will piss you off to the core and you might want to shoot me, huh?” – Athena sounded like she was really thinking deeply about it. 

“Well, if I catch you having sex with the neighbor probably.” - Bobby tried to laugh it off.

“No, Bobby. You know I’m not able to cheat on you.” - Athena grimaced fastidiously.

“And I’m not able to kill you as well.” – Bobby’s eyebrows raised.

“Okay, listen, there might be things, which I used to do and which drive you crazy, but you tolerate it for the sake of peace and quiet?” – Athena put her hands on her hips and started to look like a mother of a family figuring out where a negligent husband hid his money.

“No, nothing like this.” – Bobby objected briefly.

“I’m sure, you’re lying now.” – Athena didn’t let up.

“What makes you say that??” - Joking aside, but Bobby was starting to get a little angry about her suspicions.

“I saw your face once when I let Rick spit that wine we were tasting into your favorite mug.” – said Athena.

“Yesss, that was ONE UNPLESANT EXPERIENCE. I agree... but not to the extent of shooting you.” - Bobby raised his hands up.

“Then I remember how angry you were when I didn’t tell you I threw away your old ugly shoes you used to wear for a walk in the garden.” – Athena definitely wasn’t going to give up. 

“Yeah, you could at least ask me before doing this. They weren’t even old, I bought them when I moved in here. Confess you just didn’t like them.” - Bobby continued to fend off this absurd interrogation.

“They were awful, only bums wear such shoes, I don’t know how in the world you could buy those..” – Athena told in her defense. 

“You violated my human rights by throwing them away. Still I wouldn’t kill you for that.”- Bobby said conciliatory.

“Okay, let’s talk about how pissed off you were at me when I put in the washing machine your white shirt from the uniform and forgot that there were my moulting red socks already.” – That was just endless, Bobby thought.

“Yes, I was mad at you for making the shirt pink that I needed to put on for my uniform that day. Still I didn’t shoot you, you’re still here alive.” – He pointed. 

“But confess it – at least for a second you thought a possible murder?” – Athena’s eyes were sparkling. That’s ridiculous, she can’t be serious – Bobby thought.

“Athena, STOP THAT! That’s crazy! Even if I’d catch you having sex with our neighbor, I would rather go kill myself, than shoot you. You got too involved with that damn case.” – proclaimed Bobby a bit annoyed. 

Suddenly Athena’s approach changed. She decided to voice the emotions that got the best of her. “The fact that the husband broke the gnome figurine and her other handmade stuff just made my heart bleed.” – She confessed.

“I know, I know. Come here.” – Bobby came closer and embraced Athena into his arms. He suspected there was something deeper for her than these ridiculous assumptions.

“You know, she worked on it for so many days, she put a soul into these things…” – continued Athena. Of course, she was tired and being tired she always became more sensitive. The unsuccessful conversation with Michael also added to that. 

“Yeah, awful.” – Bobby agreed, kissing Athena in the neck. – “I wouldn’t ever break this funny clay vase that you and Hen made on a pottery masterclass for her birthday last month.”

“What?? That vase isn’t funny!! I will go and shit the entire bathroom in revenge and you will clean it!” - she threatened Bobby. 

“Okay, okay, sure I will.” – Bobby laughed, catching Athena’s hands and immobilizing her. 

“You’re awful. If you won’t shoot me, then I will shoot you one day, I promise.” – she said jokingly, kissing him on the lips.

The traces of the exhausting day finally started to leave Athena. Bobby silently prayed that they would always be able to create this light playful atmosphere in between them and never lose trust in one another.

` _The end_


End file.
